Can it be that I have not posted here since the end of
October? So much has happened since
then…. And I have been responding to all
of it… on auto-pilot, to some degree.
My close friends know that I do not do well in large
crowds. People… scare me. So when I feel the press of humanity, I tend
to retreat, shut down, introvert. The
same is true when a plethora of woes fall upon me; the creative aspect of my
nature flees to the subconscious level, happily writing novels in there
somewhere, while my conscious self deals with putting out fires.
Fire #1: Turns out
the medical issue I was having was not an illness of the heart, but of the
lungs. Finally, in November, I was
diagnosed with (no doubt congenital) bronchiectasis. For most or all of my life, I have not had
healthy lungs. Several factors in August
caused them to go into overdrive trying to get enough oxygen, which made my
heart pound. The symptoms, for the most
part, are alleviated now, though the issue with my lungs is “permanent and
irreversible,” as my pulmonary doctor so tersely described for me. In that moment, his diagnosis seemed like a
death sentence. Now, a month down the
road, it is something I can live with… because, well, I’ve been living with it
all my life. I just didn’t know.
Fire #2: Exactly 24
hours after my diagnosis, I made an offer on a new home. This was made possible because
Fire #3: a very
interesting (ß-------polite
way of describing rude, selfish, boor) and affluent man made an offer on my
cabin.
So basically since mid-November I have been (1) following
doctor’s orders by walking the loop every day—rain, shine, snow, wind, darkness
(at times)—and using medication; (2) filling out escrow papers; (3) FAXing
escrow papers, loan documents, copies of any and all things to do with my
income; (4) reading daily emails from my real estate agent about new demands
from my buyer and about how no one else
in this process seems to be as efficient or timely in their manner of
completing tasks. ARRRRGGGGHHHH! Oh, and (5) singing. When I get really stressed, I sing, mostly as
a means of calming myself, but also as an outlet… because if I didn’t sing, I
would just sit down and cry out of frustration.
We’ve been trying to explain to my buyer for six weeks that we must get
escrow closed before winter because winter means snow and snow on the road
means no moving trucks….
Forecast for today and Thursday? More snow.
But enough about me.
It’s Christmas Eve!!!
May all the joy of the season surround you! (Can you hear me? I’m singing “Silent Night.”)